All in One Place: The Limericks of December

The Centennary

Luggard and his Flora took aim

And whimsically gave us a name

A century gone

‘thout even a song

But now we revel in the same

 

Politics

There once was a governor who wept

It seems funds were sloshed as he slept

The pictures depict

All schools derelict

His aides must be really adept

 

The quest to be pragmatic

Makes questions automatic

When brooms kiss brollies,

Chickens, (follies!)

The future’s problematic

 

See how it’s now different here

So much so, it’s totally clear

That PDP rage

Is now viewed “on stage”

No longer a “family affair”

 

The Senator mannered so mild

Who Stella the Syrian once piled

On heaps of abuse

For culture misuse;

Is blessed again with a girl-child.

 

Operation: Save Akinola

There was a Bishop named Peter

The Anglicans’ old gate-keeper

Got kidnapped in Ogun

Then saved by Amosun

An APC rescue-team leader.

 

A Bishop was kidnapped in Ogun

But before the news could be broken

Commandos swooped in

Rejoice, Bishop’s kin

All hail SWAT Leader Amosun!

 

 

Football

So Suarez is wearing the (c)

Ol’ Rodgers being crafty, is he?

For as we all know

Dear Luis will go

To London or Spain, certainly.

 

Catfish

Dear Friends,let us lay this to rest

This verificational test

Who’s real & who’s not

Who’s only a bot

Whose life is a soupjoint request

 

Hollywood

Beyoncé, she pulled off a coup

Made music & videos too

Spent nothing on hype

And yet, true to type

They’re luvn it, luvn it, oooh!

 

So Khloe’s divorcing Lamar

Another de-conjugalled star

Tis best when you wed

T’keep private your bed

And not live your life in a jar

 

Stella’s Aerotropolis

10 MILLION JOBS, they chorus

And no, don’t say it’s bogus

The latest update

From Aunt ‪#Stellagate

Is the Aerotropolis

 

Chris and the Catholic Church #SaccharineDelights

Fresh Chris our old-time rock star

Has verily lifted the bar

Condemning to Hell

The Catholic swell

He says they are for Lucifer.

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